I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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