her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize