That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
