so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
