You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Randomize
