Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I look better un-naked...
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I wish you could order shots online.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
