it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I need to stop coming to work sober
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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