this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
