I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
