i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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