just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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