i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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