i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
