TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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