I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Randomize
