i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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