She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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