That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Your topless pictures make me question reality
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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