she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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