it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Randomize
