You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
