everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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