Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
