how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
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