This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
