im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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