let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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