come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
