Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize