you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
