I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
should my penis look like a turkey
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Randomize
