This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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