i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
