I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
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