how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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