Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
