I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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