Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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