bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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