You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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