I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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