Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
