awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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