he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
He felt like a one man threesome
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
