I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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