According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize