I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
