goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I just forgot I was standing up.