I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Two words: blizzard sex
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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