I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
