even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
