Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
